Sunday, August 4, 2013

School Days


How did this happen?! (Insert wail of despair and gnashing of teeth here.)

And while Dancer and Diva are off filling their heads with both the useful and infinitely useless - the baby and I are staring at one another warily. His gaze seems to say, "OK, mom....what you got up your sleeve now?"

Because, let's face it, I'm not as entertaining as his sisters.

But, regardless of whether or not I was ready (and I wasn't), school is here. The days have become filled with laying out our uniforms, and packing lunches. Checking homework folders, and rearranging nap schedules. It has been complete and utter chaos. Controlled chaos is still chaos and is still exhausting.

Diva's take on her very first day of school ever...."Well, I didn't bite anybody."

That's good, baby. Very good. Keep up the good work.

And Dancer seems relieved to be back in school. In fact, they both walked away without a single glance back. That is either an indictment of my mothering or an endorsement. I'm choosing to see it as the latter.

All in all, having them both in school is....OK. Not awesome, or any of the other adjectives I kind of thought would be appropriate if given significant blocks of time away from my children. But OK. I can live with it, I guess. I think the real crux of the problem is this...they are growing up. And I'm not ready for them to. I look at them and think about all the things I've seen them learn and do, and how much more I want to teach them before they go out into the world. And then I realize they are already out there. They are already making their way.

I look at them and know that they are making their way, steadily and far too fast, towards a time when their decisions and mistakes, and their lives will be all their own. I'm praying very hard that I'm making them ready.

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